Welcome, Concerned Citizen!
Welcome to my website GodHATESKansas.com where I spread awareness on the darkness that is Kansas which lies dead in the center of our country, polluting neighboring states with conservatism, wheat fields, poverty, and the modern day effects of colonialism. I hope to encourage disdain in Kansas in hopes to bring about change that will better the world.
Kansas used to be a beautiful prairie landscape home to bison, elk, prairie dogs, mammoths, wolves, and more, but now they have all just about gone extinct, as the prairie has been replaced by wheat fields and cattle pens, and the most beautiful remaining landmarks owned as private property conveniently placed right next to state parks.
And what was once home to an ancient and conservational culture held by the native Americans who had lived in this prairie for centuries has now been replaced by conservatives who ironically don’t care at all about conservation.
Help me spread my dissatisfaction in Kansas to help bring about change!
This is the map of Kansas Counties... need I say more.
These dumbass Kansans don't know how to align the simplest of lines. Honestly so sad to see, please vote for change. Support me and I WILL remap the county lines. Thank you for your attention to this matter.
Official Kansas Flag Review
Design summary: blue rectangle + tiny historical group project + ugly sunflower + giant name tag.
1.5/10
It's a bad seal on a bad flag and THEN they had the NERVE to write their NAME on the damn thing. Words. Don't. Belong. On. Flags. It really is just a horrible flag overall.
Suggested redesign: just make it look like a prairie at this point
Upon ascension I shall:
- I shall bring back the 406,000 acres of wetlands that were LOST.
- I will absorb the privately owned Monument Rocks into Little Jerusalem Badlands State Park.
- I shall pave the dirt roads, making them actually usable.
- I will rename South County Road 7 to Kiowa Road, after the Native Americans that once lived there.
- I shall rename County Road 8 to County Road 7.6, as it always should have been.
- I will rename County Road 350 to Kiowa Road 2.0, once again for the Native Americans.
- I shall rename South Meridian Ave in Wichita to County Road 736, but North Meridian Ave will be spared.
- I will increase Bison populations by 1073%.
- I shall restore the Great Prairie.
- I will give CAD300B to Wilson, Kansas to further their Czechoslovakia cultural efforts.
- And most of all: I shall have Kansas annex Kansas City in Missouri into Kansas City in Kansas, as told by Our Lord.
Hey by the way
Kansas is a real place containing real people, many of whom are probably lovely. This is satire. Thank you.